Odin’s beard — why would you want such a thing, Greyface?
That is … that is conceding defeat!
This life is but an endless battle, you see! It is forever attempting to mock you, to best you; battle after battle, it is a vicious cycle. But you must not let it triumph over you! I know you are braver than that — I know that you have the capability to be the strongest warrior Midgard has ever seen!
When all seems lost, always remember to scrape yourself from the unforgiving earth and remind Life that it shall not be victorious. Not while there is air in your lungs, and blood ever-coursing through your veins!
And, Greyface — never forget that you always have a friend and ally in myself. That is essential, in this battle. Allies. One cannot win a war alone.
And you have one in me. I swear it to you.
((Everyone go home. Thor just won the Internet.))
[[Jesus, go home- Thor has taken the wheel.]]
And then there are the places no-one talks about.
(But having a room next to Thor’s doesn’t help much either.)
The communal bathroom.
There was one time we all stood outside of the bathroom for 2 hours before finally breaking down the door. Turns out Tony fell asleep in the shower. We made him pay for the new lock. And the new door.
Sharing a kitchen.
When you share a kitchen with college athletes — one who most likely has the munchies 70% of the time — not to mention countless night owl students, nothing’s going to save your food from being eaten by someone else. Unless it’s currently in your own mouth. And even then it’s not 100% safe.
To be fair, though, Thor thought the shawarma belonged to Clint, so he was trying to get back at him for drinking all of his expensive beer last weekend.
And as for Loki, he lives in a single room dorm rather than a frathouse, so not a damn thing.